True Love

Recently, my Heart has been broken wide open. Just purely and completely shattered. Leaving a gaping hole in my chest, resembling a shotgun wound – not just any old gun shot wound – but like a huge double barrel shotgun has been placed to my chest and blown it away.

During this time, I have been praying for a Love to soothe my Heart. a Love that is True. A Love that is steadfast and honest and strong – and real. Not some figment of my imagination or my projection – but a Love that is really real. I have been holding out hope for the one day that I meet that kind of Love – that kind of Love that loves like I know how to Love. Full on! Just head first, dive right in. Feel it, resonate with it, get swept up in it, know it, taste it, trust it – and be so fully steadfast – and hold on no matter what.

Then today, I was thinking of my friends. Who have been my life line. Who have sheltered me and loved me when I was so down and broken and thought I wasn’t worth loving. Who have shared with me some of my greatest sorrow. Who have shared with me some of my great joys. And who have loved me so unconditionally that it moves me to tears. And in the midst of my grief and gratitude I became devastated at not having done better, not having done more, not having been a better friend.

As I languished in this heartache, I realized something about True Love. Here, my friends have been there with me when I was sad, and cried with me, and championed me, and helped me move mountains, and believed in me. And, my friends have been there with me as I ascend interdimensional realms in cosmic Bliss while unlocking the secrets of the Universe. They actually love me and care for me when I’m weak and when I’m strong and all those places in between.

I had been “looking for Love in all the wrong places.” And was missing the Love right in front of my face. I have opened to Loving myself, my energy, my vibration, my Light, my life and forgotten my own words – that our reality can only match our vibration. I have been vibrating Love and at the same time had my eyes closed to the present moment while dreaming of the past, and therefore didn’t see my own self Love coming back at me in droves and from all directions.

Now, my eyes and my Heart and my Being are wide open and all that Love that I have put out in my lifetimes and lifetimes is flooding back. And I let go of that last barrier that separated me from myself – that barrier that I clung to – only to feel oceans of Love flooding my Heart, flooding my life. And I am speechless.